Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Marital discord

Unless you're planning on a divorce, wouldn't severing your husband's genitals sort of be self-punishing as well? Unless he's really bad in bed? Or impotent anyway?

It just doesn't seem likely to me that she was thinking long-term.

Which may be something I wasn't doing earlier today, as I critiqued a short story written by evilkev. I typed out comments like, "Put a period at the end of your sentences, or something" and "He pauses a lot. Shouldn't you just say it was like he was stuck in neutral, with the occasional spasmic jolt forward?" and after the words 'with a thoughtfully look' I had to ask if it was fully thoughtful or just thoughtful?

Of course, I had to point out some missing words and some grammatical oopses as well.

Its actually a very good story. Born out of spousal frustration that he keeps bringing me ideas that I don't write into stories.

It's like I've been trying to tell him - you have to write the story that's calling to you, and right now my mind's on Fucked.*

But maybe I should have passed his story over to someone else to do a critique? I guess if there's a sudden shortage of blog posts and you hear rumours of my untimely demise, we'll all have the answer!

I had to put up an extra blog post today, because James was so late with his, and then it was virtually a copy of my other post. So yet another man I've had to compensate for. Sheesh. It's so frustrating when you rely on a guy to meet your needs and he's off reading your manuscript or biking or having painful urination or something.

And, because every day should have a little treat to it, check this out. Sound on. And if you have a problem with procreation, you might not want to watch the last teency little bit.**

* Go for it Boy Kim. I know I've left myself wide open...
** All the dogs will skip commenting and go straight to the link now. Which means that the guys will deliberately stop and post a comment, so they don't seem like dogs. Manipulation is a fine art.

24 comments:

Evil Kev said...

When I wake you up at 3 am by dropping a cat on you, you will find out what a thoughtfully look is

R.J. Baker said...

The horror, the horror.(Marlon places his bald head in his hands)

Castration for drinking and kareoke. A harsh punishment indeed.

Women sure are a little vendictive, do we get a prize when we hit the right spot...a few times? I think not. It's off with his HEAD.

I'm not sure which is the rougher crowd; the single women looking to bag the ellusive wandering guy... or the married, what have you done for me lately, Janet Jackson, black widow type that will F-your brains out and then kill you or cut the holiest of holies off..yikes.

I have to turn down the morphene drip....

JamesO said...

Let this be a warning to all you wannabe pub-singers out there. Karaoke is wrong, and you will be punished if you insist on doing it.

And Sandra, I'm sorry if I messed up your blogging routine. It was all Trace's fault.

Boy Kim said...

"Fucked". "Wide open".

Not sure there's much I can add to that.

Boy Kim said...

Legs akimbo, perhaps?

Sandra Ruttan said...

"Fucked". "Wide open". Not sure there's much I can add to that.

Is that a comment on your inadequacies?

I'm in agreement with James. Karaoke is wrong.

But there's definitely a story in this. You know, a warm and fuzzy Valentine's story. Cupid's arrow missed the mark?

Boy Kim said...

I'd need a much bigger space than this blog allows to do full justice to my inadequacies.

Trace said...

That's twice this morning that I've seen that something's my fault! LOL! I can take it, though. I have strong shoulders. *Grin*

I'm just so thrilled to be such a bad influence. Ah, the nostalgia *Sigh*

Sandra Ruttan said...

I don't think it was your fault Trace! Did you hog-tie him? Put a gun to his head? See, he had free will. He just chose to blame you. Men.

(Though James is really a good person. I think.)

jason evans said...

Critiquing a spouse's writing (especially a beginner) can be like splashing under a jet fuel fountain in the middle of a match factory.

Sandra Ruttan said...

Sounds like you've had some experience Jason!

Evilkev took it well. See, he even posted on here, so we're still communicating!

Boy Kim said...

I can imagine critiquing your partner's work is similar to teaching them to drive. Something to be avoided at all costs, at least in my experience.

Erik Ivan James said...

No way am I sharing my novel parts (the book) with my wife. I want to finish it before the end of my day and she knows the combination to the gun safe. And, its not the guns I'm worried about--I also keep my hunting knives in there.

Sandra Ruttan said...

Evilkev's read all of my manuscripts except the latest one, which is only at first draft stage. When he's wrong I'm not afraid to tell him he's an idiot but occasionally he has a good suggestion.

Or one I ignore until he writes his own darn story!

And erik, shot or sliced - in the end its the same diff, isn't it?

Erik Ivan James said...

Depends on the placement of the shot. Besides, I'm a classic male "pig" and the knife could do me far more damage than the gun.

M. G. Tarquini said...

You know, I read things like severing genitals and understand why I don't write murder mysteries or thrillers or anything that aren't comedies.

I mean....

ouch.

Sandra Ruttan said...

It doesn't hurt to write about it, MG. And the great thing is, if you've ever dealt with someone you really despise, you can make a fictional version of them the bad guy in your book and get your revenge.

One mystery author wrote her first book during her divorce because she wanted to kill her husband...I'm sure many people can relate to that!

Notice all the guys except Stuart and John R posted comments today too. So those two are the dogs and the rest are at least working on the illusion that they aren't!

R.J. Baker said...

Arf, arf...

Sandra Ruttan said...

I was going to ask if this is where I throw you a bone, but Boy Kim might still be lurking and we all know what he'd do with a comment like that!

Dana Y. T. Lin said...

The Evian water thing was kinda cute.

Sandra Ruttan said...

Thanks - I thought so too!

Boy Kim said...

I object! I've never lurked in my life. Well, ok, that's not strictly true. There was that one time when I...

Ok just had a word with my lawyer, who suggested I keep quiet.

Sandra Ruttan said...

So your lawyer really does earn his fee!

Boy Kim said...

She does indeed.