Saturday, April 29, 2006

Babes, Beefcakes, Blood and Somebody Spank Me. Please.

Writers, start your pencils
Beefcakes, Babes & Blood - this short story competition from MystericalE, has a submission deadline of May 15 so get writing!

Check out their website and submission guidelines for more details. This contest looks to be right up Trace’s alley.

Detours
Yesterday, blogging art connoisseur Lisa posted a link to The Fantasy Novelist’s Exam. Check it out! Made me smile.

Congrats!
The sensational JT Ellison’s story placed in a short fiction competition – congrats JT!

JD Rhoades Needs Your Help to Fulfill a Sexual Fantasy!
How could I forget to post a note about helping one poor man live his sexual fantasy? Run right over and click on the link.

In The News
Between a 12-year-old girl being charged, along with her 23-year-old boyfriend, for killing her parents and 10-year-old brother and now another 12-year-old girl being charged for setting a woman on fire, it’s been one wild news week in Canada. And one of those dramas played out not so very far from here.

But we’re really nice and there’s no crime here. So no need to set crime fiction in Canada. Who would believe we’re capable?

Somebody Spank Me
Woman spanked by her employer gets $500,000 in compensation. Anyone want to hire me and grab a paddle?

Okay, okay, not to mock her very legitimate complaint. But half a million bucks? Wow.

Another child’s letter to God Posted by someone who's enduring SNOW the past two weekends.

16 comments:

For The Trees said...

Well...what a collection of thoughts.

At least the geek's girlfriend is good-looking.

At least the 12 year old girls got arrested. Even if the juvenile justice system has to let them go when they turn 21 - here in Texas they do. The only question in each case is "Why?" Of course, understanding Why won't help any, but it will make good copy in The National Enquirer...

Spanking a 53 year old woman was patently abusive, unless she was selling it. And in a work environment, what the fuck were they thinking???? Of course, they were salespeople. Totally different race. Nuff said.

The exam was a true eye-opener. I guess that shoots the hell out of my first five novels...

angie said...

Beefcake, Babes & Blood. Hmm, not much to work with there, huh? Just kiddin'! I've got a great short story idea involving hamburgers & bloody mary's served by animated pigs who have a yen to visit the big city. Oops! I'm not supposed to share my ideas, am I?

Wish I could say I was shocked by the killer 12 y.o.'s, but I'm not. I spent several years working with kids just like these (behavioral health, community based & residential treatment). For the most part, these kids have had amazingly awful lives. When you hear their stories, it's not a big leap from extreme abuse to extremely violent acting out. Mostly, they were awesome kids who had managed to survive, but had some truly fucked up ideas about what was okay & what wasn't. Of course, I met a few who were just straight up budding sociopaths. Some scary, scary kids.

Clicked over to J.D's blog & senor porn whore already has nearly 4 million hits on his site. I think his girlfriend needs to either start looking for a new man or break out the K-Y. I'd go for option #1, but you never know with kids these days.

Bonnie Calhoun said...

LOL...you said the dreaded "S" word! Who's still getting snow...please no more!

James Goodman said...

Wow, that must have been some kind of spankng... :D

JT Ellison said...

Hi S,
Thanks for the plug -- I appreciate it. After yesterday's Princess of Darkness confession, everyone is teasing me that there was no blood in that story. I'll try and redeem myself with the Mysterical E contest. Thanks for posting it!

Lisa Hunter said...

I think you managed to squeeze every genre into this post!

Sandra Ruttan said...

Oh Lisa, I'm all-embracing today! LOL! Snow for the masochists...

Good luck to all who enter the mystericale contest, and I'm partially drugged on the kind of pain killers that seep in through the skin, so thanks all for making me smile.

Hope you're having a great weekend.

JD Rhoades said...

Hey, it's not MY fantasy, it's this Dan guy.

At least that's my story. And I'm sticking to it.

Sandra Ruttan said...

Ha ha, JD. I never said it was your fantasy. Now, if you felt guilty, well, that's on you...

Mark Pettus said...

Sandra,

After scanning down your list, I can't help but wonder...

How many hits can we get at a site with pictures of me spanking you? If we put up some good adlinks, I'll bet there might be some money in it (don't bother to sue me, I'm broke).

On second thought, I just read your story over at Demolition - good stuff - but somehow I picture you more as a spankor than a spankee.

Sandra Ruttan said...

And all this time I thought your picture was an open invitation for spanking.

Alas, I'm not much of a spanker or spankee. Although I'm convinced a website with you spanking me likely would attract a lot of attention.

In fact, you may have given me a new marketing idea... Can I have your phone number?

Lisa Hunter said...

On second thought, this post needs some bodice-ripping. Today's Washington Post says that romance novels account for 40 percent of fiction sales.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/04/29/AR2006042900280.html

Not that your line of discussion isn't entirely fulfilling....

Brett Battles said...

It seems to me if a spanker goes halvies with a spankee, this could be a pretty lucrative business. Defintiely could finance a few years of undisturbed writing time...

...hmmm...

(no snow here. Sunny and warm in La-La Land. And the L.A. Times Festival of Books today was awesome, but I'm wiped!)

Mark Pettus said...

First impression - humorous quip.

Second impression - you might actually have a marketing idea

Not that it matters, I've given my phone number to women I'm sure meant to do far worse than spank me...

If you really want my phone #, email me. It wouldn't hurt to send me some of those naked pics you claim you don't have. ;)

Sandra Ruttan said...

Well, I usually have a supply of naked photos.

But last time they were distributed so fast and JA Konrath hasn't restocked my supply.

Bastard.

Trace said...

I wanna be spanked, too!! And that short story contest does look like fun. I've been feeling mighty hostile lately. I should write a nice, violent, bloody story.