Wednesday, August 30, 2006

A Joke That Will Make My Husband Blush

And proof I really don’t understand guys. It’s HERE at Mai Wen’s. I swear, this is not what I thought guys did in their bedrooms behind closed doors. And watching to the very end is worth it, even for the torment of the noise pollution that passes for music. The facial expressions are priceless.

It’s Wednesday, which means I have a new post up at Killer Year. But I can’t post this joke over there, and it’s funny, in a tasteless kind of way.

First, though, the news that someone ended up on my blog from googling ‘squelching the gag reflex during oral sex’. I’m fairly confident I never discussed that during an actual post, but this could be the residual effects of that conversation David Terrenoire and I had end of March, following the post I did make on oral sex. Wonder if I should go sanitize that?

Oh, and it’s Wednesday. Which means Dar Wednesday.

And, because there must be higher intelligence in the universe, that means it’s Cornelia’s day over at Naked Authors, and it’s Naomi Hirahara at Murderati. How did I end up on Killer Year on the day all the smart people blog? Maybe I’m the counterbalance of intelligence in the blogsphere…oh lord. That’s it, isn’t it?

Well, at least I have proof that many of the best jokes come from my Uncle Charlie.

In Pharmacology, all drugs have two names, a trade name and generic name. For example, the trade name of Tylenol also has a generic name of Acetaminophen. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also call Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen

The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin. Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix, and, of course, Ibepokin.

Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of "cocktails", "highballs" and just a good old-fashioned "stiff drink".

Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of: MOUNT & DO.

Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

If that joke makes your husband blush, I really must meet him. I'll have him speechless in seconds.

I love that video! I keep waiting for the guy in the background to turn around and do something. Those guys crack me up. It makes me feel much better about the singing I do in my car. You know, when I'm not cursing. norby

Eileen said...

2040 should be a very interesting time. Then again I might not know what is going on either so I most likely won't care.

anne frasier said...

sandra, i think you have to win something for that google.

the top two googles for my blog:
1) root canal or get it pulled
2) i'm crushing your head

Sandra Ruttan said...

Norby, it's more that he gets embarrassed by what I put on my blog. He keeps asking what happened to his sweet, innocent wife. It's simple. Marriage. :)

Eileen, exactly. And if you can't remember, you can't regret...

Anne, I'm not even sure HOW I got that google! Bizarre.

S. W. Vaughn said...

Can't...comment. Laughing...too... hard...

Mycoxafloppin.

BWAH-hahahahahaha!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Ah, I see. I think occasionally my husband wonders what happened to the shy young thing he married. He truly doesn't realize that he's the one who brought out this corrupt nature of mine. norby

Sandra Ruttan said...

SW, always happy to share a smile!

Norby, yeah, women are always corrupted by men! Hmmm. Have you noticed none of the guys have commented today? Wonder if that joke was a bit too much for some? Of course, blogger comments have been down (again) but us women managed to (finally) get through...

Anonymous said...

They're all off pondering their...shortcomings? Or maybe just fearing old age. norby

Anonymous said...

I can't get that damn Backstreet Boys song out of my head! norby

Sandra Ruttan said...

I'm really sorry Norby. I tried to issue a warning...

Evil Kev said...

My question is this:

"If pre-marriage Sandra met married Sandra, would she have called off the wedding and got a restraining order?"

Things that make you go Hmmm...

Sandra Ruttan said...

Pre-marriage Sandra probably would have run like hell.

Except she was too stubborn to listen to anyone...

Anonymous said...

It's my own fault-I love that video, they're so into it. And I just keep waiting for that guy in the background to do something!!!
norby

Trace said...

HAHAHAHAHA!!!! Good stuff!!

mai wen said...

Hehe, glad you liked the video Sandra and company! That joke is hilarious, I literally sat here and said them all out loud, you just have to!! Good thing I'm working at home today due to my pink eye so I was able to say it out loud. :)

Thanks for the laughs!

Oh, and you don't even Want know what people google to get my blog... I guess having "Asian Fun" in the title doesn't help my situation... hmmm...

Sandra Ruttan said...

LOL Mai Wen! Funny how some words have so many alternate meanings!

I love the video. I don't know what it is - like watching a car crash. You don't want to, but you can't help yourself.

Julia Buckley said...

Okay, the Viagra jokes had me laughing right out loud! I am a bawdy woman. My husband, on the other hand, barely cracked a smile. Maybe he's afraid he'll need Viagra one day.

Sandra Ruttan said...

Ah, so that's why all the guys avoided commenting on this. :P