Thursday, May 10, 2007

The Cure For Grumpiness is...

...read a personal favourite.

So, I’ve had my nose stuck in The Hanging Garden and that’s been so good. Well, not so good for any of you who wish I’d shut up already about those books…

The good news is that in recent days I had to make some tough decisions. And some of those weren’t choices I wanted to make. However, once I did I felt a lot better. I knew I needed to refocus my energy, and for a little while I also knew I had to come first. Well, okay, the two dogs and seven cats come first. And the spouse. But I’m a close...11th, if you give everyone individual ranking. Good thing Russie's snobby and doesn't like much attention.

There’s something about putting it out on your blog that’s cathartic. You’ve made a public statement, which means you have to keep it or answer for it. And that’s good as well. I doubt anyone will yell at me if, a year from now, I’m still reviewing, but even if I don’t quit I’m cutting back.

See, I talk tough…

We’ve had some great news. First there’s the news lots of you know about that I’m not supposed to talk about yet, so we’ll celebrate again later this month. Then, there’s the fact that South Story Million Writers Awards listed Haven City by Beverle Graves Myers as a notable story of the year. Congrats Beverle!

In fact, this makes the third bit of happy-smiley Spinetingler news I’ve had in a short span of time… the other one also being confidential but having a remote connection to British blades.

And I'm also thrilled for this Russel, who is not a snob, but also made the South Story list.

Now, in order to spread mirth and joy to all the nations, I’m going to have a draw for free books! Can peace on earth be far behind? (Sarcastic little thing, aren't I?) Send me an email OR leave a comment and tell me which book (or books if appropriate) you’d like to be entered to win… I’ll take entries until Monday night your time. Which basically means anything that comes in before Tuesday morning will be considered, because I'll be too lazy to check timezones, then I’ll draw winners. The trade-off is you have to give me your address, which I promise not to send junk mail to, but if you’re an important person I may be forced to sell it on eBay. You know, to feed the two dogs and seven cats.

The two books I have to give away are…

The Business of Dying by Simon Kernick.
&
A Question of Blood by The Author Otherwise Known As God

And since I know I have to make you all feel like you’re working for it, you have to answer a trivia question as well.

Que: What is the name of The Author Otherwise Known as God?*

Now, on a completely fun note, don’t blame me, blame Norby.
Man driving down road.

Woman driving up same road.

They pass each other.

The woman yells out the window, PIG!

Man yells out window, B I T C H!

Man rounds next curve.

Crashes into a HUGE PIG in middle of road and dies.


Thought for the Day: If only men would listen.

Okay, if you’re tempted to groan then I challenge you, leave a better joke in the comments thread. I will be practicing selective hearing as Evil Kev lectures me for yet another bad joke on my blog.

(He should just be glad I didn’t put up the really dirty ones I was sent this week. It takes a special kind of dirty joke to be beyond my limit.)


* It is not necessary to answer correctly, but you may embarrass yourself.

7 comments:

anne frasier said...

loved the joke! sorry to hear you won't be going to boise! i was looking forward to your report, but i completely understand. conferences are expensive, time-consuming, and energy-draining. and hard to justify if you've got a lot going on.

Jersey Jack said...

My entry for dumb joke of the year: A man dressed as a Roman gladiator walks into the bar, sits down, tells the barkeep he wants a "martinus." The barkeep says, "You mean martini, right?" The gladiator shakes his head, no, says, "If I wanted two, I'd ask for them."

Glad you're feeling better, S.

Randy Johnson said...

A guy walks into a bar carrying a big paper sack. He sets it on the bar and orders a beer. The bartender brings it and asks, "What's with the sack?" The little man reaches in and pulls out a small piano/stool, reaches back in, and brings out a small man who proceeds to sit and play. "Where did you get something like that?" The man told a tale of walking down the beach, finding a dirty old lamp half buried, pulling it out and rubbing the dirt off. A Genie emerges and offers him a free wish. He pulls a lamp from the bag and sets it down."Mind if I try it?" The little man shrugged. The Genie of coursr emerges and offers the bartender a wish. "I want a million bucks!" "DONE!" The Genie snaps his fingers and a raucous noise arises as ducks began falling noisily over the bar. "What"s the matter with him, he hard of hearing or something?" The little man shrugged and said, "You don't really think I asked for a twelve inch pianist, do you?"

Brian said...

How come the woman couldnt have hit a dog?

A guy walks into a bar

Ouch

Its like that Pussy/Chicken cartoon.

Sandra Ruttan said...

Anne, I should email you...

Jack, that really could be the dumb joke of the year.

Randy, ha.

Brian... (shakes head)

jersey jack said...

My jokes are planned to be dumb. Enough of them, bloggers pay me to go away.

Sandra Ruttan said...

I like dumb jokes sometimes. Nothing like a good groaner. And your philosophy might be sound!