Monday, September 04, 2006

The Good, The Bad, The Tasteless...

In July I had a rant about the Ontario government and the fact that they were cutting off funding to autistic children at the age of 6. Good news. It's being reported that they will remove the age limit. For the moment, they're no longer on my 'burn in hell' list.

John has pointed out to me that Hardboiled Jesus starts here. Not here. You know, reading the first line of 1 instead of 1A, I'm glad to say that I referenced 1A. My friend Bonnie would have had a stroke.

You know how it is, when you've been pushing hard to get some things done and up against deadlines? Well, I crashed on Saturday. Sleeping in the afternoon. I'm feeling pretty crummy, in general, and really hope to rebound fast here. But I am enjoying a good book in bed, so at least there's a good side to short intervals at the computer.

Tomorrow, I'll have a sneak peek at the next Spinetingler.

Evilkev says this joke is so tasteless. He can't believe what my uncle sends me.

$100 Tattoo

Larry gets home late one night and his wife, Linda, says, "Where in the hell have you been?"

Larry replies, "I was out getting a tattoo."

"A tattoo?" she frowned. "What kind of tattoo did you get?"

"I got a hundred dollar bill on my privates," he said proudly.

"What the hell were you thinking?" she said, shaking her head in disdain. "Why on earth would a CPA get a hundred dollar bill tattooed on his privates?"

"One, I like to watch my money grow. Two, once in a while I like to play with my money. Three, I like how money feels in my hand. Four, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want."

17 comments:

John Rickards said...

Everyone wants a stroke when HJC's in the room.

Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all week.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the link to the beginning of hardboiled Jesus. I've found it a little dismaying to see some bloggers self-censoring with things like f**k and s**t and c**k and g*t f**ck*d y*u f**kin* c**t etc etc. I like to know where the limits are. Harboiled Jesus tells me there are no limits. Great stuff. And I loved the tasteless joke. Now I'm off to f**cking burn in that c**t of a place called h*ll.

Anonymous said...

That joke was so wrong. Very very very funny, but wrong. norby

James Goodman said...

Oh, that joke will be told again.

Sandra Ruttan said...

John... You've rendered me speechless. And you know me, so pat yourself on the back.

Australian John, have you met English John? You'll love his blog. Yes, he is proof there are no limits. I only censor myself when my good twin is dominating, which isn't often. But John is pure evil. :)

Norby, I know exactly what you mean.

James, I'm glad you liked it. It's definitely a guy joke.

Tracy Sharp - Author of the Leah Ryan Series said...

LOL naughty!

Tracy Sharp - Author of the Leah Ryan Series said...

And I hope you feel better soon, Sandra. *HUGZ*

angie said...

Congrats on getting past the deadline - and recovery can take a little while. That joke scored pretty damn high on the naughty scale.

Confessions of a Starving Mystery Writer said...

I once wrote a short story where Jesus had a t-shirt on that said "Got Pussy?"

I thought I was hardboiled. John goes one step beyond, as always.

Sandra Ruttan said...

Trace, thanks. I still feel crummy, but it's just one day.

Angie, thanks. Agreed about the placement on the scale.

RJ, HA! That's funny. John really has nailed HJC, hasn't he?

Bonnie S. Calhoun said...

*she clutches her chest* I, uh, er...no wonder you don't feel well *she gasps* neither do I!

Sandra Ruttan said...

LOL Bonnie! I never suggested you go read that one, I swear!

Anonymous said...

Once and awhile a day spent snoozing on the sofa and reading a book is exactly what is needed.

JamesO said...

How much did John pay you to set up that joke, Sandra?

I pity the poor sensitive readers who followed your link to HJC. I'm still waiting for the episode with Mohammed the PI in it.

Erik Ivan James said...

A great male "pig" joke. Love it!

Bill Cameron said...

The wife's response should have been, "A hundred dollar bill? Hah! More like a roll of dimes."

Sandra Ruttan said...

Eileen, I couldn't agree more!

James, since when did you get so sensitive yourself? Mohammed the PI? And Buddha the bouncer?

Erik, glad you liked it. Hey, I thought it was funny, in a 'dream on' kind of way.

Bill, you can really pull out the lines.