The people making tv commercials are ruining my life. Seriously. We’ve all seen them. Buy this fantastic Swiffer housecleaning product and you too will want to dance around the house dusting your heart out.
In fact, you’ll even dance and dust through the mansion your friend owns, until she tells you to stop cleaning.
Yeah, right. Like that would happen. If I had a friend over here dancing and dusting, I’d grab a book, sit down and make myself comfortable. Who wouldn’t?
Every time Kevin sees these commercials, he asks if buying me that product will produce the same results. And I have to say that after 7 years of marriage, he’s daft enough to think that? Please.
We were in the kitchen one evening, making dinner, and Buttons came in. She started chewing on something on the floor. Kevin said, “What’s she eating.”
I foolishly said, “I don’t know. It could be anything.”
I hate doing housework.**
Now, can we say duh? What was this guy smoking?
And I stole this from Bonnie’s blog, because it’s priceless. Thanks Bonnie!
ACTUAL AUSTRALIAN COURT DOCKET 12659 --- CASE OF THE PREGNANT LADY.
A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus. She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her.
She immediately moved to another seat.
This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again. The man seemed more amused. When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing, she complained to the
driver and he had the man arrested.
The case came up in court.
The judge asked the man (about 20 years old) what he had to say for himself.
The man replied, "Well your Honor, it was like this: When the lady got on the bus, I
couldn't help but notice her condition. She sat down under a sign that said, 'The Double Mint Twins are Comin' and I grinned."
"Then she moved and sat under a sign that said, 'Logan's Liniment will reduce the
swelling', and I had to smile."
"Then she placed herself under a deodorant sign that said, 'William's Big Stick Did the Trick', and I could hardly contain myself."
"BUT, your Honor, when she moved the fourth time and sat under a sign that said, 'Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this Accident'...I just lost it."
** The rest of this post has been preempted while the writer mutters curses and whines as she attempts to clean up around here. Although she's discovered if she leaves a big mess, her husband usually cleans up when she's traveling. Which is very convenient and suits her just fine.