Tourism Victoria is defending a new advertising slogan that says "the search for your perfect orgasm is over".
So, um, if you don't achieve that do you get your money back?
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THE FRAILTY OF FLESH
About Me
- Sandra Ruttan
- I am the author of What Burns Within, and The Frailty of Flesh,published by Dorchester. I’m also an editor with Spinetingler Magazine. My own work has appeared in Pulp Pusher, Crimespree Magazine and Out of the Gutter. Visit my my website for all the latest news.
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WHAT BURNS WITHIN?
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15 comments:
So they say it's going to appear in culinary magazines, and I know that many people do approach food as a sensual experience, but I gotta say that food is not the first thing I think of when I see or hear the word orgasm. norby
Here's my question. If you're married and eat something that produces an orgasm, is that like cheating? I mean, what if you keep going back to Victoria, ordering the same food? Can a spouse object?
Okay, apparently I have nothing important to think about this fine Saturday afternoon.
It's interesting that there's a different version of the ad for gays and lesbians, one which mentions a "tingling sensation" instead of a "perfect orgasm." Don't gay people want the perfect orgasm, too? What's the implication here? The last time I had a tingling sensation, my doctor told me I had to lower my cholesterol, drink less beer and get more exercise. I'd rather have that orgasm than another one of those goddamn tingling sensations.
Ah Patrick, you're killing me! I agree, although for me it wasn't so bad. The last time I had a tingling sensation was when Tiger Balm was being rubbed on my neck.
(And why is it that I only seem to be commenting on sex-related messages these days? What's that about?)
I get to Victoria six or more times a year. I was there, in fact, a few weeks ago -- twice -- on the way to LCC, then back again. And though my orgasms show up quite regularly under the right circumstances, I've never had one in Victoria. (Which is probably a good thing, since I'm generally shopping or dining.)
Which brings up another thing about the tourism ad: they might be promising perfect orgasms but do you want them if you're there, say, at the Royal BC Museum ("Oh, cave dude!") or having tea at the Empress with your mother-in-law ("Oh, Earl Grey!") or, you know, having a dirt burger at Rebar ("Oh hemp-clad server!"). People could get the wrong idea.
And that's another thing: just what is the perfect orgasm? How can they promise that? Isn't that truly something that's in the... er... eye of the... um... beholder?
OK: I'll stop now. I'm with Sandra: it just seems to be that kind of Saturday.
Now see, because of my chronic headaches I'm supposed to report all tingling to the doc, but any tingling sensations in that area will be kept to myself thank you very much! Perverts. norby
Patrick,
How about drinking the same amount of beer and doing LOTS more exercise? That seems more acceptable to me.
When I clicked on to the page, there was a car ad next to it. For a minute, I thought maybe they were advertising a new kind of machine that....you get the idea.
I must agree that not all tingling sensations are ideal. Orgasms however.....yeah.
"How about drinking the same amount of beer and doing LOTS more exercise? That seems more acceptable to me."
Jeremy, walking to the corner store for beer is a great workout. It burns calories and makes me thirsty. The more beers I drink, the more walks to the store I need to make, and the healthier I get.
You guys are totally cracking me up!
Well, you gave us so much to think about. norby
Patrick,
How about buying individual cans? Just think of all of the exercise you could get!
I love Victoria, but tend to resist the whole High Tea at the Empress thing. But this could change my mind.
Just remember Bill, you're supposed to drink the tea and eat the food. Your clothes should remain on at all times. Otherwise the Empress will kick your ass out. norby
Is it just me, or does anyone else have a hard time with thoughts of the queen and orgasms being mentioned in the same discussion?
Better than a cold shower...
Oh, absolutely no pun intended there, eh E. Ann?
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