Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Double wahoo and WTF?

Ah, our tedious little federal government has fallen at last. Yep, that's right, a Christmas campaign. I wonder if that means personalized Christmas cards from all the contenders? I do recall a few years back my sister got a nasty one with Jean Chretien plastered** amongst the holly. Scared the bejeebers out of me.

So, not only will we have egg nog and merriment, we'll have campaign promises along with all the festive cheer. Goody. And since it sounds like a January election date, that means we'll probably freeze our butts off trudging out in the middle of a blizzard and with our fingers vibrating like a chandelier in an earthquake, I'm not sure we'll even have the motor control to mark the box we're after.

Man, I'm so anxious for the feds to catch up with modern technology and have a remodelled pay-per-view system where we can just click a button to pick which clowns we want to watch the most from the comfort of our own couch.

And it's snowing. Oh, my dogs are so happy. Now, if only I can teach them to shovel all 230 feet of sidewalk we've got around our place...

And, in the WTF category, well, I read mail that is received by a magazine. So, yesterday, there’s this long letter outlining in detail the process of creating this elaborate story. I kid you not, the letter is like five pages long and I have to wonder if the writer knows the magazine publishes short stories. I mean, if the query is longer than the guidelines for the stories generally published how long is the actual story? Is it like an anthology of stories all on its own? Buy 1 get 20 installments?

Plus, the writer just sent this loooooooonnnnnggg outline. The writer didn’t ask if the magazine wanted to read this story. Didn’t ask if the magazine thought this idea had merit. The writer just told us about it. I really want to write back and say, “So?” but I’d get my ass kicked. The editor is so fussy about crap like that.

** This is not a comment about how much he’d been drinking, though he looked pretty relaxed for a politician. Must have been the pay-offs from the sponsorship scandal.****
**** Oh, sorry. Our politicians would never do anything wrong. That’s what Mr. Martin keeps saying. I must try harder to remember that.

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