Saturday, December 01, 2007

If You Like Your Roses Wilted...

There is one person who completely understands how to satisfy me, and at my lowest moments always manages to make me smile.

And today, they've done it again. Finally, unlike breast enlargements, a gift that really does keep on giving.

Buy it now on amazon.

Not sure of how you could use this wondrous product? It really is multi-purpose, something for everyone! Let me share just a few of the remarkable reviews with you:

An adequate solution...., November 30, 2007
By Chris Gladis "Chris"
I have to admit, I've tried many different power sources for my orbiting satellite death beam, and nothing does it like good old U-238. If you've never held an entire nation hostage for your maniacal whims (I always ask for my ransom in kittens), then you haven't lived yet. And this can make it happen!

It's also a wonderful dessert topping. A little of this on your ice cream and the kids will just scream and scream and scream....

It's been rated better than ovaltine:

November 30, 2007By J. Stanfield (Austin, TX United States)

When mixed with Tuscan whole milk I gained the power to control deceased woodland creatures. I am now in the process of raising an army of undead wombats to overthrow the government from deep within my volcanic lair. Soon you all will bow down before the wombat king!

Still not convinced? Read on!

For the man who has everything, December 1, 2007
By T. Koboldt "MUM1" (Columbia, MO) - See all my reviews

With the holiday season coming up, many of us are wondering what to get the special people in our lives.
For the man who has everything...why not try cancer?
One slather of this (hypo-allergenic) body cream will not only give him something he never expected to get, but he'll also learn his lesson for being so uppity and having everything in the first place.

Radio-licious!, December 1, 2007
By Shannon M. Kinsella "shannon" (Columbus, OH United States) - See all my reviews

Thank god, finally a product that is both fun for work and home! It's something you can play with together as a family... heck invite your grandparents! Amaze you bosses to be the first one to bring this to the corporate cookout, watch everyone be stunned with ooh's and ahh's.

I cannot recommend this enough. But it NOW!!!

Miracle Product!, December 1, 2007
By D. Welker (Alabama)

I purchased this item and mixed it with my wife's lotion, hoping to collect on her life insurance policy. We hadn't been getting along, to say the least. Next think you know, she's growing another set of breasts! I've never been happier.

This product saved my marriage!

I wonder if Chris Gladis is a pseudonym for John Rickards?

I'm telling you, some Uranium Ore and this book in my stocking and I could deal with the door to door salespeople once and for all...


Anonymous said...

Well I think a stick of dynamite would round things off nicely. I'll see what I can find.

It's possible that recent life events have turned both of us just a tad too cynical and evil, though that might not be possible.

And my word verification has these letters:fuok. Appropriate, no?

Sandra Ruttan said...

I don't think it's possible. Can you ever be too evil?

Fuok is indeed appropriate!